One Pink Shoe

15 Nov

As I read this book to my daughter last night I had to refrain from commenting on every single page and/or laughing. Pull up a chair and we’ll read it together.

First, look at Barbie’s sister Stacey. She’s wearing a purple half-shirt and tight high-water pink pants, yet it appears Barbie is consulting her for fashion advice. This, as evidenced on the next page, will prove to be a foolish decision.

 

 

 

 

 

“My cinderella costume or my purple denim vest?” asks Barbie.

“No, Barbie! Wear the lemon-lime suit. It’s perfect,” says Stacey, whose crush on Ken has led her to an attempt at sabotage.

Note the rascally pup under the bed… he’s up to no good, I’m sure of it.

 



The pink mock turtleneck ties in with the hat box she’s holding. Gorgeous pumps.

The pink mustang convertible appears to be the size of a clown car, but I’m sure if anyone can manage to squeeze into one it’s Barbie.

 

 

 

 

First, I’ll answer your question about Ken’s pants: I have no idea where you can find a pair. They are straight up FAB.

He and Barbie clearly planned to wear turtlenecks. I bet she didn’t know he’d short-sleeve it, though.

Now let’s take a moment to acknowledge the absurdity of the political correctness in this picture.

Stupid.

 

 

I just cannot get over those pants.

And Ken’s little hair helmet.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Barbie must not be hungry, she hasn’t eaten a bite! Hmmmm…

What a swell afternoon date at the disco it was!

 

 

 

 

 

 

A hearty handshake and she’ll be on her way.

Surely this is the end of this riveting tale…

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dear Lord there’s more.

Barbie is buying Stacey her first bra, along with a couple of swimsuits. This will prove to be fortuitous momentarily.

 

 

 

 

Here comes Kevin, followed closely by a strange character in an orange shirt. (getting a close-up view of that person is definitely worth the trouble of clicking on the picture.)

 

 

 

 

 

 

The girls get to show off their new swimsuits, in addition to the fact that they have no belly buttons.

Who’s the bitch sitting on the side of the pool? She was NOT invited.

 

 

 

 

Wait. A. Minute.

Barbie is going to cheat on Ken, isn’t she?

What a slut.

(sharp intake of breath) Look at that crazy dog! Again with the shoes…

 

 

 

“That damn dog has my shoe,” said Barbie. “I’m calling the police!”

I just realized something… I owe Barbie an apology. This picture clears some things up. Kevin and Dan are actually a couple.

Oops. Sorry, Barb!

 

 

 

“Why fellas… there’s all my missing shoes!”

Did Barbie ever stop to think that this might be Spot’s way of asking for a little attention? Doubtful.

Look at Dan… any second he’ll shake his head and say something about Mentos.

 

 

 

 

 

 

What a long, boring, convoluted story about a missing shoe.

The End.

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31 Responses to “One Pink Shoe”

  1. amy November 16, 2010 at 10:32 am #

    I. CANT. STOP. LAUGHING. the BEST story i have ever read!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  2. (you have no idea who you're dealing with) November 16, 2010 at 11:36 am #

    I couldn’t stop my eyes from rolling back in my head while reading it to the wee one… (thanks, Amy!!!!)

  3. KM November 16, 2010 at 4:56 pm #

    Stacey looks like Quinn Morgendorffer.

  4. (you have no idea who you're dealing with) November 16, 2010 at 5:46 pm #

    The only thing different might be her lack of a belly button, but I’ve never seen Quinn’s either, so it’s up in the air, I suppose.

  5. Chase DeLozier November 19, 2010 at 12:13 pm #

    I am obsessed with your blog…

  6. (you have no idea who you're dealing with) November 19, 2010 at 1:13 pm #

    I’m obsessed with you!

  7. Kingham December 2, 2010 at 12:20 pm #

    Ummmm…that was a pack of Mentos in Dan’s pocket?

    Does Mentos have a “girth” flavor?

    (that was awful)

  8. ShaRhonda January 14, 2011 at 6:48 pm #

    OMGrapeJelly you totally made that first grade level reading book into a the best Barbie story ever! Thank you so much for that laugh! Loved it! Mrs. Hart @ The RHOK

  9. (you have no idea who you're dealing with) January 14, 2011 at 11:56 pm #

    Mrs. Hart… good timing. Thank you for the kind words. xoxoxo

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