Don’t Tell My Husband

9 Oct

I would never hide purchases from my husband. I mean, please! How disturbingly white bread and soccer mom* cliché would that make me? Gross.

I am so far evolved and above that level of energy-wasting, depressingly “American” kind of behaviour (see?) that I practically float above my peers in my superiority.

Why not just tell him?

“Look honey! While you were out slaving away all day [relax, feministas], I bought these chic chic CHIC plain white fingertip towels for the guest bath.

Now, enjoy them from afar for the next three weeks or so before I impulsively change the entire décor.”


Try it. Empower yourself today!

P.S. I didn’t really say any of those things… but you totally should.

*Never refer to yourself (or worse, to me) as a “soccer mom”. I read somewhere recently of a woman saying she was proud to be a soccer mom. She’s lying. She. Is. Lying. Maybe to herself, but by God, not to me.

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